CancerCare Caregiving

Find support and helpful information as you care for your loved one with cancer.

Ask CancerCare

Every month, featured experts answer your questions about coping with cancer including specific answers to questions asked by caregivers.

For Any Cancer Diagnosis
►Q.My dad was diagnosed with cancer last month. He and my mother live in another state, and I have a family of my own so I can’t be there to help them out on a daily basis. What can I do to support them from far away?

►Q.My grandmother has cancer. I’m worried about her, but even more so, I’m worried about my mom. She tries hard to be strong for everyone, but she is just so run down herself. She seems uncomfortable letting us be there for her. Any advice?

►Q.How can I support my cousin who has cancer without saying something stupid or wrong that would upset her more?

►Q.I’d like more information about how to help a close friend being treated for cancer. I’m also wondering if a support group could help me, too?

►Q.Three weeks before the holidays, my father was diagnosed with advanced cancer. Hospice care has started but I find it isn’t enough and other family members who live in town really don’t offer help. Some days seem too overwhelming – how do I focus on everyday activities?

►Q.I’m wondering if there are any good resources out there that would help me know what to expect as I’m taking care of my mom who has advanced cancer.

►Q.My husband was diagnosed with cancer in 2009. He finished treatment and is cancer free, but he continues to act like he still has cancer and is dwelling on it instead of getting on with his life. Is this normal?

►Q.Do you know of any organization that would help me pay someone who takes care of me? She is not related but takes me to all my appointments, cleans my house, does my shopping and anything that needs done.

For Brain Cancer
►Q.My cousin found out that his 4-year-old daughter has brain cancer and it could be terminal. What can I do or say to help him (and his family) through this difficult time?

For Breast Cancer
►Q.My mother was recently diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer and about 2 years ago, began to show signs of dementia. Can you refer me to resources regarding providing care to patients with dementia and cancer? My elderly father is the primary caregiver and I am an out of town caregiver.

For Colorectal Cancer
►Q.I live in Queens, New York and my brother who has stage 4 colon cancer lives in Canada. I am one of his caregivers and he will be with me in New York for two weeks soon. Is there any way I can get counseling for him? He is depressed and has not coped well with his diagnosis.

For Leukemia
►Q.One of my best friends has had a bone marrow transplant for leukemia and will hopefully be getting out of the hospital soon. I’m looking for a website where people can sign up to sit with her over the next few months and take her to doctor appointments. Do you have any suggestions?

For Lung Cancer
►Q.My 68-year-old husband was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2004, had radiation and chemo, and is currently in remission. Since ending his treatment, his personality has changed drastically and he directs his anger towards me. Can chemo affect a person mentally?

For Pancreatic Cancer
►Q.My son’s partner was recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and the prognosis is not good. He is very much part of our family. Our son looks very stressed and sad and sometimes is irritable and short with me, which is very unlike him. We have talked to him about getting some help but he says no one will understand because his partner is a man. What can we do?

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